Sky For Forever
by timelords-wizards-winchesters
Summary: Just after the Time War, the Doctor seeks solitude on a deserted island. When he unexpectedly meets a curious mermaid, she offers him a kindness and a comfort he doesn't deserve. Nine/Rose Mermaid!AU.
1. Chapter 1

He came to Earth, once it was all over. The fires had extinguished, the screams had silenced. But the memory lingered, a fresh wound in his empty mind. He sat in the sand, closed his eyes, longed for a peaceful moment.

Not that he deserved it. Not after what he'd done.

The sand was damp and heavy at the edge of the shore, like the uncomfortable weight of the guilt on his shoulders. It grated against his new skin as he shifted. The calm waves brushed against his legs and soaked his torn clothing. He watched his bare toes dig into the ground beneath the water.

He tried not to think. Tried not to feel. Failed miserably.

"Hello."

The voice startled him out of his thoughts, dragging his attention to the large, seaweed-covered rock that sat several meters to his left. His head tilted to look at her, laid out on the smooth surface. His eyes followed the curve of her body, from the long blonde hair that fell over her shoulders in wet waves to the tip of her golden pink tail.

The thought crossed his mind that he'd never seen a mermaid, before.

He looked away. Said nothing.

She didn't take the hint, though, and kept talking.

"We don't get many visitors around here," she said. "I don't know if we've ever had visitors at all, actually. Other than crabs and birds."

He looked back at her and met her eyes – a warm shade of brown, wide with curiosity. He wondered what color his eyes had turned out, this time around.

"The island is uninhabited," he said. He paused, surprised by the gruffness of his own voice. He hadn't heard himself speak, yet.

A hopeful smile crossed her face once she'd grabbed his attention.

"I thought so," she said, biting her lip, suddenly seeming shy. "I've never spoken to a human before."

He didn't correct her. Stayed quiet.

"Are you alone?"

The word felt like a blow to the chest, a brutal reminder of everything he was running away from. The tightness in his chest made it difficult to breathe for a moment. The emptiness in his mind was almost unbearable. He swallowed.

"Yeah."

He fell silent again, and looked out over the water. The waves crashed gently against the shore. He focused on the sound of them, the relaxing, repetitive motion, and dug his feet deeper into the sand.

"My name's Rose," she said, when he didn't continue. "My mum says I'm named after a plant. A beautiful one, from the land, that comes in lots of colors. But I've never seen one."

It suited her, he thought, glancing back. _Rose_. She was watching him, a whirlwind of emotions swirling in her eyes, and he couldn't pin it down – curiosity, pity. Probably both.

"What's your name?" she asked, hesitant. She wasn't going to give up, he knew, not until he properly spoke to her.

"I'm the Doctor."

"Doctor," she repeated. "That's a person that helps people, isn't it? When they get hurt, or sick?"

"Yeah," he said, vaguely surprised. "You sure do know a lot about life outside the sea. For someone who lives under the water, near an empty island."

Rose flushed, glancing down at the tip of her tail, dipping just below the surface. She swished it around in the shallow water. His eyes trailed the movement, watching the light of the late afternoon glint off of her metallic scales.

"I like to learn about it," she says. "My mum says I shouldn't. She doesn't like it when I go exploring ship wrecks, or come up to the surface like this. But I like to look at the sky. It's gorgeous, don't you think? All the different colors."

She gestured at the sun on the horizon, just beginning to set. The sky was still bright, yellows fading into oranges, oranges fading into reds. It reminded him of Gallifrey. He turned away from it. Looked back at Rose.

"And even when the sun sets," she continued, "the stars look so beautiful at night. Like little pearls in the sky."

"They're even more beautiful up close," he told her, though he didn't know why. Perhaps he was grateful for the distraction, or inspired by her curiosity. Maybe he just didn't want to be alone, right now.

"What, you mean – you've seen them?"

"I like to travel."

"You travel through the stars?" she asked, her voice hushed with excitement. He nodded.

"Bit of a wanderer."

"That sounds wonderful," she gushed. "Like a dream."

They fell silent again, the sun sinking further past the edge of the sea. It was getting colder and darker.

"Where are you from?" she asked him, and he shook his head.

"Nowhere."

"Nowhere?"

"My planet's gone," he said, his voice dangerously low.

His eyes met hers, filled with sadness and sympathy he didn't deserve. He allowed it to soothe him anyway.

"What happened?" she asked him quietly.

"It's dead. It burned. There was a war, and we lost."

"What about your people?"

"They're gone," he said. "They're all gone. I was the only survivor. The last of the Time Lords. There's no one else."

She hesitated for a just a moment before she responded.

"There's me," she said, offering him a tiny smile.

The corners of his mouth turned up slightly.

"You don't know anything about me, Rose."

She shrugged.

"I know you're alone," she said. "And you shouldn't be. No one should be alone."

"I'm not – I'm not a good man," he said, burying his face in his hands. "I've done terrible things."

Silence fell again, and she attempted to change the subject.

"I feel like I'm alone sometimes, too. No one back home understands. My mum, or my best mate Mickey. They tell me I'm wasting my time, coming up here every night to sit on this rock and watch the sunset and see the stars. The they're just lights in the sky, and what's the point?"

He lifted his face, turned his head. Her brow was furrowed, eyes looking upward. She was frowning. Doubting.

"They're wrong," he told her firmly. "There's so much out there. So many places to see, and people to meet."

Rose smiled, then, widely, and he knew he'd piqued her interest. Slowly, he stood up and brushed the wet sand from his legs. When he pulled himself atop the rock to sit beside her, she shifted closer to him. He pointed up at the sky, just over her head.

"Over that way, millions of miles away, there's a planet called Cyllia. It's like Earth, except the whole planet is covered in foliage – like a giant garden. There's a whole island, about the size of this one, entirely dedicated to roses. They grow them in bulk, cultivating bushes of all different colors, and ship them out to other planets. They're the most sought-after flower in the galaxy."

"Wow," she breathed. "It must be so beautiful."

When he glanced down at her, her eyes were wide with wonder, and an excited giggle escaped her. He grinned back at her, wide and genuine, and his hearts felt a little bit lighter.

She laid a hand on his arm. Her touch radiated warmth. It was the first time anyone had touched this body.

"My ship can take me there," he said.

"A ship? Like a boat, with sailors?"

"No. A spaceship," he said. "It can take me anywhere."

"You should go see it. That planet," she said. Her smile was sad.

"I want you to come with me," he said. He didn't realize how true the words were until he'd said them. She let out a watery laugh.

"I wish I could," she said wistfully, staring down at her tail, dangling in the water below. "Maybe one day."

She leaned her head on his shoulder, hugged his arm, and he found that he didn't mind. He didn't deserve her comfort, he knew, but god, he was craving it, more than anything.

"Doctor?" Rose asked.

"Hmm?"

"Will you bring one back for me? A rose, I mean."

"I think I can manage that," he said. Her hand trailed up his arm, and she leaned closer. Pressed a kiss to his cheek. His breath caught in his throat. He titled his head to look at her properly.

"You've got beautiful eyes," she said softly. "Like the afternoon sky."

They were blue, then. He smiled. The darkness had settled around them, the stars just beginning to twinkle in the sky. He didn't want to go, but he knew he needed to. She sensed it, too – their time was coming to a close.

"I should probably get home," she said, watching the dark water with disdain. But then she turned to him and smiled. "You should go, too. See all the stars for me, yeah?"

He didn't speak. Nodded.

"Thank you," she whispered.

He watched her dive back into the water and shifted off the rock, landing with a dull thud in the wet sand. She started to swim away, her tail glimmering with every movement.

He shoved his hands in his pockets. Turned around.

He spun back when she called his name.

"Don't be alone," she reminded him, and she dove beneath the surface.

He walked back to the TARDIS, leaving footprints in the sand.


	2. Chapter 2

He went back to find her again a few weeks later, once he was slightly more comfortable in his new skin. He'd looked in the mirror once he got back to the TARDIS and grimaced. Not the prettiest, this time around. All rough around the edges, sharp angles and callused hands. It made sense, he supposed.

He'd avoided looking at himself, after that.

But now, he walked toward the beach, and wondered what the hell he was doing, coming back here. He had told her he would. But it wasn't like he had promised. And even if he had – he had broken promises before.

Really, he was just getting lonely, again.

He looked down at the bouquet of roses in his hand. Bright and colorful. Reds and oranges and yellows and pinks. Like the sky on the night that he'd met her. He hoped she would like them. Clutched the flowers tighter.

She was sitting on the same rock as before, laid out on her back over the seaweed, basking in the sunlight. Her tail dangled off the end of the smooth, flat surface. She hummed softly to herself, watched the sky.

At the sound of his heavy footsteps, new boots thudding in the sand, she sat up. Her head whipped back in his direction, and she let out a tiny, surprised gasp.

"It's you," she said, her gaze trailing from his head to his feet. "I was wondering. If you'd ever come back."

"Said I would, didn't I?"

She gestured for him to join her, patting the rock beside her tail. Her expression was just as welcoming as he remembered. Warm, kind eyes, and a soft, charming smile. As he approached, she shifted to make more room for him. His thigh pressed against her tail, firm scales brushing against his black pants.

Once they were settled, he held out the flowers for her to take, and her smile widened.

"These are roses?" she asked him. He nodded. Her fingers brushed against his, soft against his rough, callused hand as she accepted the bouquet.

"Fresh from Cyllia, as promised."

"They're beautiful," she said, letting out a breathless laugh. Her eyes were wide with wonder and what almost seemed like disbelief. Her fingertips traced the delicate petals of a pink flower. For a moment, her nose scrunched up, and she leaned her face forward to inhale. "Oh! And they smell heavenly. Are all flowers like this?"

"They all have scents, if that's what you mean. Slightly different, though, depending on the species."

"It's lovely," she said, and she breathed in deeply again, burying her nose in an orange rose. "Everything in the sea is all…salty."

"I would think so."

"Oh, shut up." She cocked an eyebrow at the smirk on his face and hit him in the chest playfully.

He had her full attention now, he realized, as she set the bunch of flowers on the rock beside her. She reached for the lapels of his new leather jacket, running her hands along the material. It would be foreign to her, he knew – no leather like that in the sea. She rubbed it between her fingers, then smiled and gave it a little pat, just above the heart.

He was all too aware of his proximity to her now, as he was examined under her careful gaze. If she tilted her head up just a fraction more, their lips would only be inches apart.

He leaned away from her touch. Cleared his throat.

"Have I got your approval, then?"

She blushed a little at his words, her pink-tinged skin nearly matching the color of her tail.

"Maybe," she teased, her tongue peeking out of the corner of her mouth. "Really though, Doctor. You look…better. I like the outfit, it suits you."

He couldn't help but smile and let out a pleased hum. She rolled her eyes at his smug response.

"You're supposed to say thank you," she said, but she was smiling nonetheless. "You think you're so impressive."

"I _am_ so impressive."

"I supposed," she shrugged. She leaned backwards, stretching out over the surface of the rock. Her hands linked behind her head, a tiny cushion against the hard surface. She closed her eyes.

It was like a painting, he thought, as her tail shimmered in the sunlight. Her hair spilled onto the seaweed in golden waves.

He realized after a moment that he was staring. He shifted uncomfortably. Averted his eyes.

"So," he said, watching the water. "How's life down in the deep blue sea?"

"Hasn't changed much, really," Rose sighed. "Dark and wet. Not very exciting, down there."

"No?"

"I did go exploring a bit, though. Found a sunken ship a few weeks ago, dragged Mickey along with me. But it was mostly empty, and I got an earful from Mum for days afterward."

He looked back at her, hesitating before he moved to stretch out beside her. He leaned back on his elbows so he could still watch the subtle movement of the waves. She opened her eyes as he shifted, and smiled when she saw what he was doing. She picked herself up and leaned on her own arms beside him.

"You, though," she said. "I bet you've had all sorts of exciting adventures, up in the stars."

"Been a few places."

"Tell me about them. I could do for a nice story."

"Bounced around the neighboring solar system for a bit. There's a planet called Woman Wept. It's rather famous, because of the frozen waters. Something happened to the sun – all the heat sucked out of the atmosphere. And the entire planet froze over in an instant."

"Even the ocean?" she asked, and he knew from the distant look in her eyes that she was imagining. "Wow. That must be gorgeous."

"It is. That's why I went. Also stopped an alien invasion on the planet Ionamo."

"What, really?"

"Yeah. They've famous mountain ranges there, hundreds of miles high, and they stretch out for miles. I just went to appreciate the view, but I got caught up in events, you know," he said. "There were these people from a nearby planet that crash landed, caused a bit of panic."

"But you helped them?"

"Yep. All settled. I was able to reason with everyone."

She hesitated before she asked her next question.

"On your own?"

He glanced down at her and swallowed.

"Yeah. On my own."

"All this time, you've been alone?" she asked, her brow furrowing. "This whole year?"

"Year?" he repeated. "What do you mean, year?"

"The last time I saw you was almost a year ago, Doctor."

"A year ago," he repeated incredulously, thinking back to when he set the TARDIS coordinates. "But I – well. Twelve months, twelve weeks. Same difference, I suppose."

Rose gave him a strange look.

"What are you on about?"

"It's only been twelve weeks, for me," he told her, and she shook her head.

"But – I don't – how does that even work, then?"

"Did I never mention? My ship. My spaceship. It also travels in time."

"You're pulling my tail," she said, laughing with disbelief. "You can travel through time? Oh, don't even answer that. Of course you can."

He delighted in the sound of her laughter, unable to help his wide grin. When Rose fell quiet again, she sighed and sat up straight. Taking his cues from her, he did too. She shifted closer to him, leaned into his side, just a bit. He let her.

"That sounds amazing," she said. "Travelling through space and time."

"It is."

"Not if you're alone," she said firmly, fixing an intense glare in his direction.

He wants to smile at her fiery insistence, and tell her to just come along, then, and he won't be alone anymore. He wants to show her – give her proof of everything he said. Show her the high, frozen waves of Woman Wept, watch her breathless laughter puff through the cold air. Take her to see Cyllia, because a lousy bouquet was no match for the expansive gardens they had come from, and he already knows how excited she would be, and how she would say yes, if she could.

But she couldn't. And all he had to offer were secondhand stories and flowers that would wilt.

And he didn't deserve her, anyway.

"I don't need anyone," he said instead, but he couldn't quite meet her eyes, and he was sure she knew he was lying.

"Then why did you come back here?"

He didn't have an answer for her.

"I told you when we met," she said. "No one should be alone."

"And I told you when we met that you don't really know me."

He clenched his jaw and looked away from her sharply, out over the ocean. For some irrational reason, this wonderful, pink and yellow mermaid was showing him unending kindness and compassion. And he was sitting there, letting her do it. Like a selfish fool.

She leaned away from him, seeming to understand that he wanted space. The cold sea breeze drifted between them.

"I'd like to know you," she said. "Don't think I haven't noticed that I've been doing most of the talking, here. You haven't told me anything about you, other than the fact that you're on your own."

He stayed quiet. Waited for her to continue.

"I know you're from a different planet, and that you like to travel. An alien, that's what the humans call you, isn't it?"

He looked back at her and nodded. She was watching him carefully, her brow furrowed, more curious than anything else. She paused, and he watched her consider her next words.

"And I know that you're lonely," she said. "I know that you're hurting. You've lost your people."

"Thanks for the reminder." He looked away from her again and clenched his hands into fists against his thighs. His throat felt like it was closing up.

"Doctor," she said softly, "you can't hide behind your grief forever. You can't let that sadness and loss define you."

He said nothing.

"I lost my dad, when I was young. He was hit by a fisherman's boat, and he died. And he was all alone. So I know. I understand what it's like to lose your family. No one should have to experience that."

He realized, while she was speaking, that his hands had started shaking. He took a deep breath, his eyes screwed shut.

"It was my fault," he said. "All my fault. If you knew – if you knew what I'd done, Rose…"

"Doctor, doing a terrible thing doesn't make you a terrible person."

"It was awful. The war. It was going to destroy everything, the whole universe. And I – I ended it."

It was her turn to stay quiet. He couldn't look at her as he spoke.

"It was me," he choked out. "I killed them, Rose. I killed them all."

He heard her breath catch in her throat, and a tense silence settled over them. He buried his face in his hands, exhausted.

She would run, now. Dive back into the ocean and swim away as fast as she could. He should never have come back here.

"Oh, Doctor," she said. Her voice was thick. When he opened his eyes, he realized she was crying. "I'm so sorry."

"What?"

He watched her with increasing disbelief as she reached up to cup his face in her hands. He leaned into her touch, though he knew he shouldn't.

"I'm sorry," she repeated. "I'm so sorry you had to do that."

"I've just told you I destroyed my own people."

She shook her head.

"It sounds to me like you're a good man who was forced to make an impossible decision."

"And my choice killed billions of people, Rose. All of them, gone. With the press of a button. _I did that._ "

"But how many people did you _save_ , Doctor?"

He stopped. Stared. She was still touching his face, and his hands moved up to cover hers.

"I…"

"You did it to protect us. The rest of us. And I'm so sorry that you had to give up your home to do that."

"How?" he asked, the question barely more than a whisper. "How are you not…afraid of me? Disgusted? Horrified?"

"You're not a bad man, Doctor. I've known bad people, and you're not one of them. A bad man would never have come back, or given me flowers, or told me stories. Okay?"

"I…okay," he said, and she smiled, seemingly satisfied with his answer. She pressed a gentle kiss to his cheek, the same way she had all those weeks ago, and his hearts stuttered in his chest.

He reached for her hand then, and she entwined their fingers.

"Will you tell me more? About the planets you visited?" she asked, looking out over the water. He smiled. Nodded. Squeezed her hand, hoping she knew how grateful he was that she was there with him.

He stayed with her until sunset.


	3. Chapter 3

It became a somewhat regular stop. A tiny rock on a tiny corner of a tiny beach. He always found his way back there, one way or another. Back to her.

Part of him was concerned. Surely his attachment to this young, gorgeous mermaid was unhealthy. Dangerous, even. But he couldn't bring himself to care - not when she smiled at him, laid her head on his shoulder, laced her fingers through his.

They spent hours that way, sitting on the shore together, watching the sun dip below the horizon. When the sky got dark, they admired the stars instead, and him pointing out constellations and her marveling at shooting stars.

Sometimes he told stories, sometimes she did. Sometimes they didn't speak at all, which was just fine with him. He liked it, the quiet. The cool sea breeze, rippling over the water. The rustling of leaves from the forest in the distance. Rose's calm, steady breathing beside him. They became sounds of comfort, as familiar as the humming of the TARDIS, ever-present on the edges of his consciousness.

It was a routine. It was comfortable. It gave him a sort of purpose, whether he admitted it or not. He hopped around the universe, picked up trinkets, took pictures. Brought them back to Rose, who sat on the rock - their rock - and waited for him.

And every time she glanced up to find him approaching, boots dragging through the sand, she would smile. A warm feeling would blossom in his chest.

She asked him again and again, every time he returned, if he had found anyone.

"Are you still alone?" she would ask.

"Yes," he would say firmly. The answer was always yes. He didn't need anyone else, he didn't want anyone else. He could share the universe with her, in bits and pieces and stories, and that was enough, because she was _there_. She was always there.

Until the day that she wasn't.

He didn't think anything of it, not at first. He was probably just earlier than usual. Or she was held up by something under the water - her mother, or Mickey, or her friends. She did have a life, a huge part of her life, that he wasn't a part of. A home to go back to at the end of the day. A family.

He frowned. Settled himself on the rock. Waited.

He'd never been very good at waiting, he knew. Within minutes, he had a nagging desire to get up, pace back and forth. Dive under the water and retrieve her himself. His hands clenched into fists.

He could be patient. She waited for him all the time. He could do the same.

But then the sun was sinking lower in the sky, and it was getting darker, and he was still waiting.

A knot of anxiety settled in his chest, growing tighter with every minute that passed.

 _Where was she?_

She was always there, she had never not been there, and something had to be wrong. She was hurt, or sick, or oh, god, what if she was -

He halted his train of thought, took a deep breath and let it out slowly. Tried to calm his racing hearts. Pushed back the swell of emotions that was threatening to take him over.

Hues of red and orange flooded the sky as the sun dipped below the horizon. He watched the sun set alone. He'd never done that before, not on this beach.

It took a few hours for him to admit it to himself. She wasn't coming, not tonight. Maybe never again.

He walked back to the TARDIS with a tense jaw and clenched fists, swallowing past a painful lump in the back of his throat.

/

He left the TARDIS parked on the island overnight. Tinkered beneath the console until she wouldn't let him anymore. He was on autopilot. Wires sparked when he fiddled absentmindedly. He kept working. Tried not to think about Rose.

She wouldn't just leave, not without saying goodbye, first.

He found himself back on the beach before he even realized his feet were moving.

It was just as empty as it had been yesterday, waves cresting silently, wind blowing softly. He glanced at the rock - their rock, he thought, and dropped to his knees in the sand.

He was half-considering piloting the TARDIS into the ocean, finding her himself, when he heard the gentle padding of footsteps on the sand behind him. His heart leapt in his chest when he spun around.

"Rose!" he gasped, stumbling to his feet, scrambling to get to her.

"Doctor," she said, meeting him halfway, letting him pull her into a tight hug.

He was so wrapped up in her, in her warmth, in the faint salty scent of her hair, that it took him a moment to realize. He pulled back immediately and stared at the ground. Watched her toes wiggle in the sand.

"Rose," he breathed. "What have you done?"

His eyes shot up to meet hers, and she was watching him anxiously. She swallowed before she answered.

"I have legs now," she said.

"Rose..."

"I've been trying to find a way for so long," she said. "You just kept coming back here and you always look so sad, and I don't want you to be alone anymore. My Doctor."

"But - how?"

"I was sitting here, one day," she said, launching into an excited explanation. "I was waiting for you, like usual. You never showed that day, but there was this...this thing, like...like a dog, like you described. But it was huge, with sharp teeth and pointed ears, and - "

"A wolf," he interrupted. It sounded like she was describing a wolf. "But that doesn't make any sense. Why would there be wolves on this island?"

"Well, it was here," Rose said. "And it came up to me. Sat next to me, with its paws on my legs, and it stared at me with these bright yellow eyes. I ran my fingers through its, um - what's the word? For their hair?"

"Fur," the Doctor supplied, getting more impatient by the moment as he waited for Rose to get to the point.

"Right! So I was running my fingers through its hair, and talking to it, you know, and I was telling it about you. How I wished I could go with you. Then I started to hear this singing, like a siren's song. It was beautiful. Lulled me right to sleep. And when I woke up…"

She trailed off and looked down at her legs.

"It's only like this when I'm not in the water," she said quickly. "If I jumped into the sea right now, the transformation would reverse. But then if I laid out on our rock, and dried off…"

"You have legs," the Doctor finished, his eyes wide. Rose met his astonished gaze with a nervous smile.

"I have legs," she repeated, nodding her head. "I mean - that creature. The wolf. It must have been magic, right? I met a witch, didn't I? A kind one. And she was so kind, and she gave me what I wished for, and now…"

He stared at her with wide eyes and a slackened jaw, waiting for her to finish.

"I can...I can come with you?" she offered, suddenly seeming shy. His hearts stuttered in his chest. She stood there in front of him, this beautiful girl, offering him everything he had ever wanted since he'd met her. He could show her, now, the sights he could only describe, before, let her swim in the purple oceans of Marezda and the sparkling seas of Nianell and planet after planet until she had seen them all, and he had seen them all, and they never wanted to swim again.

He realized, then, that she was frowning, and pulling her hand away from his, and he started out of his thoughts to pull her back into his embrace, pressing his lips to her forehead.

"Doctor?" she said, and the sound of his name, whispered against his own chest, was nearly his undoing.

"It's dangerous," he told her - a final warning. A promise.

"I know," she said, pulling back to meet his eyes. Her own were glittering with the reflection of the rising sun as she stared, challenging him to say no to her. "I want to go with you."

"I want you to come with me," he said, a soft admission to himself as much as it was to her.

She smiled at him them, with her tongue poking out of her teeth in the way that made him shiver. Her hand slid down his arm until her fingers laced with his.

"Show me the skies, Doctor."


End file.
